I do Weird Things

[Adol The Red]

I've decided to describe my personality quirks for all the world to see! (All the world comes here, right?) Why? For no good reason. Or maybe to get you to do the same. Obviously these are just the ones I know about and can remember at the moment.

Robot noises. I still make robot noises, and will probably never stop. It's mostly when I'm going up and down stairs. I'll make the little servo noises for leg movement. I also do this sometimes when I'm looking around. Might as well make noises for my head movement, and move my head in a slightly robotic manner while I'm at it. This one occasionally moves beyond sounds as well. At my job we connect to fuel lines in the ground using a coupler (called a mooshead, for some reason). Anyway, there is a handle on top, and when I reach down to disconnect it I will imagine my hand latching on and locking in around it (almost... robotically). There's probably more robot stuff, but that about covers it.

This isn't as interesting (and not as original as my brain likes to think it is), but I like to take short phrases and mix up the first letters of each word. Big Time becomes Tig Bime and stuff like that. I do this on purpose, and the me inside my head thinks this is quite witty. It's not, but you try telling him that. Sometimes it goes further, though. The hotel chain Best Western of course becomes West Bestern, but then I see the word best in there, and west sounds similar to worst, so it then becomes Worst Bestern, and that annoying in my head me finds this to be the height of oxymoronic hilarity. Anyway, that hotel chain is forever renamed for me now.

When it gets really cold at work I'll do anything to not think about it, which usually ends with me singing very bad improv at the top of my lungs (the airport is loud no-one can here me) or doing skits in all my various voices. These get pretty crazy. Then of course there is also practicing accents. It's good fun, but sometimes I sort of get stuck in one, so I come up with accent specific responses in case someone asks me why I'm talking in a crappy Russian accent.

Probably more normal than I think but I like to act out arguments in my head that I want to have, or should have had. Sometimes it gets out of hand though and I actually end up legitimately mad.

And the weirdest is how a generally very private, not socially brave fellow starts this topic in the first place. I swear I had more good ones, but I can't think of them right now. I'll be sure to add more as they come to me. Anyway, tell me your things, too. Tell me!!

[Alexx]

This is probably pointless for me to respond to, 'cause me and Adol have been friends since high school for a reason (mostly: "Hey, we're very nearly the same person; high five! Lets draw random shit in class rather than paying attention.") So there may be some repeats.

- Robot noises, OH MAN. My wife could probably explain it better than I could, because most of it is without me even thinking of it. I'm not doin' this at work 'n stuff like that, but when I'm by myself or with my wife (because when you're with someone long enough you forget all the blocks in your mind that stop you from looking like a crazy person in public). One of my most common is making the Transformer noise when I stand up. My wife has heard it SO MUCH that the usual response is something like "Standing does not count as a transformation!" Thing is, she doesn't know about my STAND MODE. It's totally different from my SIT MODE. It SO does warrent a transformation noise.

- Car launch. Like, putting on some heroic music (the theme from Big O when launching the Big O, for instance) for when you're starting the car and going out onto the road. You know, like you're launching a mighty robot instead of a boring car. Also under this category is acting like the whole parking lot (I live in an apartment complex...for now) is a docking bay and the car is a spaceship. Most of this is usually in my head, but one time I went through a WHOLE THING of letting my wife know we were clear to disembark and leave the station, and so on and so forth. Because I am the coolest.

- Similar to Adol's singing and voices, I do similar things but on long car drives and when I can verify that no cars will be going beside me any time soon (and usually when it's night so the ones in front can't look in the rearview and see me screaming 'n such when I'm doing over the top voices for no good reason).

- I have a thing for plastic swords and swinging them around. Been doing it since I was a kid and it hasn't gotten old. I make noises. It's fun. It's also awesome. Also, some of them glow. Some of them may be lightsabers.

- I don't play with my toys like I used to, but the urge is still there. If I had the time and energy I'd still lay 'em all out on the floor and play out a story. My brain does it now, but I would if I could. Don't think I wouldn't. My excuse for sounding normal is that "Oh no, I don't play like I used to; I just pose 'em 'n such" but it really is an excuse. I am only stopped because there's only so much time in the day and video games or internet usually wins out. Most I do is pose them like I say, but I still have 'em swing swords and make noises. Or I attack my wife with them. You know how it goes.

- You all should make wooshing sounds when you have to run from one room to the next, it's AWESOME.

- I am really annoying to live with.

[Adol The Red]

Speaking of car launching, the ramp from a rest area back onto an interstate is the perfect car/spaceship launcher. Leaving the starlane outpost to get back to warping to the next system.

I also pretend my apartment is either a space ship, an underground base, or a castle pretty much most of the time. Especially when I'm trying to go to sleep. I absolutely cannot sleep (or live, pretty much) in the real world. I even work in the white noise. I need a fan running to sleep. If its off at any time while I'm home the place just sounds too quiet. Anyway, if I'm sleeping on a ship then that fan becomes the hum of all the systems running.

[Soeroah]

Sometimes I swear in a made-up language.


Also sometimes, when walking through town, I picture a HUD in front of my eyes showing the path I should take to walk in between dense crowds without bumping in to anyone. You know, the telescopic circles, projected path-ways, greenish colouring...



Oh, and if I see a picture or hear something I don't want to remember, I bombard myself with random images, sounds and graphical representations of the universe to desensitise myself ASAP. I call it 'memory purging', but all it does is deaden my reaction.

[Alexx]

[Bear]

Oh man! I love to map out my path in crowds, drawing the imaginary line through people like a GPS. Also, I like to pretend I'm in a rush at times as if I have urgent business to attend to, so I start speed walking through people. Many times, I will imagine that I am the Vip Viper from Gradius and all the people are asteroids or other obstacles. Every time I fly by an obstacle successfully, I will do a "whoosh!" sound, as if I narrowly missed a collision, on purpose of course 'cause I'm a master pilot!

Many times when I am driving and there is a nice density of cars on the road, I will imagine that I am playing Tetris. My car is a certain block shape, and I have to successfully maneuver through the other falling blocks so that I can get to the bottom of the tower fastest. This is made much more fun while actually blasting the old school Tetris themes, but is just as fun when you hum it yourself. Beware of being too aggressive with your play time...speeding tickets abound when you find yourself trying to win XD

Over the course of time in dating and living with Pie, I have developed a cute bear voice and many different sayings and expressions using the voice, such as "rawr rawr rawr~" for I love you. Also, I regale her with stories of my bear adventures and the fun times I have with squirrels and other forest creatures. I have different bear modes, depending on the situation as well such as topple bear, out-of-tune bear, turns-a-bear and many many others.

The place we are in now has tiles instead of carpet, so I am always careful to put my foot within the 1-foot squares. The color reminds me of The Last Crusade, so I will imagine that I'm spelling out Iehovah, lest I fall to my perilous doom (which I will act out in my mind if I miss a step). As a general rule, I make small games out of stepping in boundaries of things, thinking of pits, death traps and laser beams.

I also like to pace whenever I'm on the phone or when I'm thinking. Pacing is a must, and I tend to like to use a walking stick inside the comfort of the home if I'm thinking about things.

Apparently I write really oddly. Oddly enough for different people to point it out at various times in my life. They usually say I look like I write in a left-handed way even though I am right-handed.

I like to pick at things, such as peeling paint or blankets with little tufts of cotton. I will do it almost unconsciously trying in vain to make the surface smooth.

I like to pick things off the floor with my feet, like a monkey.

[Fixxxer 117]

[Alexx]

[Adol The Red]

Peeling stuff is fun. I love to peel stuff. Paint, skin, tile floors. Not a joke. Once when I was a kid I peeled up half the tiles in the back room of a store my step-dad owned. Nobody really cared since it was garbage anyway, but still.

Definately move with conviction when I'm in a store or in the mall by myself. I go in there with mission objectives to complete, and I'm not wasting any time.

When I'm at work I have escape routes planned out for if any predatory animals suddenly got loose. There is actually a story of a guy opening a cargo bin on a plane that a circuis was flying and having a lion greet him at the door. What happened was the lion got out of its pen mid flight. Needless to say he closed that bin rather quickly. Now, this will likely not happen again, but in case of lions I got a plan.

I absolutely have to check the back seat of my car when I get in there at night. You know, just to make sure on-one is hiding in there. I don't know why they would be, but I can't help it.

[Adol The Red]

Tell me if this makes any sense. I'm normally quiet in large groups and tend to keep to myself, but lately I've discovered that if I bite something I become far more extroverted. I've been in an up and down state of sick, and have been consuming a great deal of cough drops at work. When I'm holding the drop between my teeth, I suddenly act much more open and am less hesitant to say whatever is floating through my head at the moment. This is just strange.